This post might not come with any pictures.
Fair warning.
It also contains a funny story about pregnancy.
Mine, really.
And, I won't be offended if you can't read the post without pictures...
Its hard!
But, for those of you who have been asking, here goes!
***
Tyler and I have been married almost 4 years,
and that time has flown by.
The boy has been marvelous about the starting of the family from the beginning.
His attitude?
:You are the one carrying the baby:
:I am not going to tell you when we should start:
:We'll decide together:
This has been so comforting to me throughout our marriage.
Obviously, God knew exactly what man I needed to marry.
The past 4 years have gone by so fast,
and we have grown so close.
Tyler often remarks that we spend more time together than most married couples.
And we like it that way!
So, when we knew it was time to start multiplying,
we obviously did some "divine research,"
and chatted it up.
Among other things, we felt that we should start trying,
and around March of 2011,
we did.
I am not the girl that makes a schedule.
I didn't want it to become mechanical.
{I have a lot of reasoning behind this, but seeing as its a public blog, I'll save that for another time and place}
Anywho, the game began.
And don't you know what happened next?
I became amenstrual.
The "a" means 'without,' etc.
I couldn't have a period.
Normally, this would not bother me one bit!
Sure, take a break!
Save some money!
But of course,
now that I sort of needed to have one,
my body took a leave of absence in that department.
So, I didn't worry too much.
In June, I had one!
Hooray!
And then....
I dried up.
This time, I was confused.
How can you go from having regular periods to having 50-60 day periods?
I hadn't really read about that before.
So, I just asked my doctor to run a few tests.
Was my thyroid out of wack?
Were my hormone levels out of sync?
What about my cholesterol, triglycerides, etc?
Everything came back normal.
Which is good!
Just, not extremely helpful.
So, I didn't stress out too much,
because variation within a person's body is normal.
I was grateful to not have something more serious going on.
I just waited.
And then I got impatient.
Hello?
[This happens because I over-analyze and over-think anything medical]
I love to find solutions to mysteries.
And this was one I couldn't crack.
And then, another period arrived in September.
So odd!
I saw an OB, who, while he wore ok Doc Martins,
was a bit of a troll.
He put me on Provera -
this drug you take for 10 days, and after your last dose,
you wait 48 hours and...
bam!
You have a period.
I did not.
So, I waited 5 days more,
and got very ill.
Did you know that I am stubborn?
Oh, well I am.
Tyler had to make me promise to call the Dr.
-yeah right-
That week following Provera was the worst week ever.
I was exhausted, trying not to puke, and forget cooking.
I couldn't even look at my kitchen sink.
I would puke just thinking about what I had made for dinner that Tuesday.
Bleh.
I don't throw up either.
-shudder-
I took naps!
Since when do I take naps?
I started watching TV at night.
What?
So odd.
Finally, I had to keep my promise to Tyler.
So, with a lot of annoyance,
I called my clinic.
They said, come on in!
To the clinic we went.
This is the important part:
Of course, since I am sick, I look like death.
Naturally.
My hair is curly and out of control.
Think CarrotTop for a second.
I wore my softball sweatpants (best.ever),
flip flops,
and a winter coat.
Its October.
Tyler had been studying for a huge exam,
his eyes are bloodshot,
and to say the least,
we both look hammered.
-Arrival at the clinic-
-Talk to the dr. and Ty studies in the waiting room-
-The Dr asks questions-
-I am too nauseous to breathe-
I list off my symptoms, and then ask for a few panels to be run.
She asks me if I think I'm pregnant.
Nope.
I can't be.
I am 'amenstural'
and,
I took a pregnancy test a week and a half ago.
Its negative.
She thinks to herself,
and then orders some tests.
And then,
"I think we'll do a pregnancy test, just to rule it out."
Ok.
Whatever.
So, pee in a cup time.
A few minutes pass.
The medical assistant doesn't come back alone.
He brings the doctor with him.
They both come into the room,
expectantly smiling.
I just want to hurl.
I feel like I'm slipping sideways in my chair.
My perception of reality is fading.
They smile, and place a tiny cassette on the counter.
"Guess what?" they say.
I look at them confused - its not a good option for me to speak at the moment.
I didn't want to open my mouth.
"You're pregnant!"
Disbelief.
I get up, and look at the test.
You know how 1 in 4 women can misread a traditional test?
I don't know if this was traditional or if I just can't read,
but I couldn't make heads or tails of the dang thing.
So, I take a picture to send to Tyler.
The medical assistant insists on going to get him.
I don't send the picture, but sit down stunned.
The medical assistant comes back with Tyler.
The MA is grinning, the Dr is beaming,
and I am sitting in a chair,
looking like death.
Tyler comes in,
and I point to the test.
"Guess what that means?" I ask.
He has no clue either.
I tell him we're pregnant, as the medical staff looks on expectantly.
He looks at the cartridge,
back at me,
and says, "really?"
We smile,
high-five,
and both sit down.
I have never seen a doctor look so let down!
[especially since I've been seen in this clinic for months about being amenstural]
***
Needless to say,
different blood work got drawn,
we got our anti-nausea prescription,
and now look back and laugh about the time we
high-fived
about our first child.
